How does one become fat?

December 2022

How does one become fat?

Have you ever asked that?

Have you ever wondered?

What makes fat cells love some souls more than the others?

I wish the answer was simple.

I wish someone had told me that when a man touches you inappropriately it’s not ok to eat a cookie.

Or when relationships fail, you don’t bake your sorrows in the oven.

You don’t have to drink to feel numb till you don’t feel the pain from all the mistakes you have made over and over and over again.

No one tells you that life is going to punch you hard.

No one teaches you to conquer dragons running wild in your veins.

No one stands with you when the skies are dark to shine light on your buried dreams.

No one.

But you.

You find solace in multi-coloured universe of sugar and salt.

Eating gives you a sense of belonging.

Eating puts your demons to sleep for few hours so you can stay awake.

Food is not food.

Food is sanity.

You choose food over people.

Repeatedly.

You feel protected under layers and layers of cells where no one can find you.

No one can mock your dreams here.

Your palate is your master, and desires are easily ignited by sugar.

You are not fat.

You are just broken.